From Failure to Radical

Iris Palma in Tips and Advices

Mar 18, 2022 • 2 min Read

Sad things happen. Shit happens. We fail. But life must go on. But how do we respond to our circumstances? How can we move on?

I understand now that PAIN leads to SUFFERING.  Holding on to pain and making it the center of our existence will drain the life out of our own existence. Pretending that we are okay will not heal us. We deceive ourselves and the comeback may just be equally terrible.

It is easy to deny or resist the existence of our pains. We say: “I’m okay, I’m okay” all the time. Deep inside, we suffer. We are stressed. We get sick. We may die. In 2019, the United Nations reported a staggering 2.8 million work-related deaths worldwide. This is on top of 374 million cases of workers getting injured or sick. Let’s not even talk about suicides.

I stumbled upon the concept of radical acceptance. It is a two-fold habit. One, we recognize our pain, anguish, grief, misery, and where they come from. Two, we get into the habit of being accepting individuals by managing our emotions so that we are able to solve our problems and handle our pains.

To practice radical acceptance, remember the acronym RAIN by healer and author Tara Brach:

• R — Recognize what is happening. What is your pain? Ask your heart. Listen.
• A — Allow the experience. Accept the pain. Do not deny its existence.
• I — Investigate. Why do you feel the pain? Why does it even bother you?
• N — Nurture yourself. Be compassionate to yourself.

Recognize. Allow. Investigate. Nurture.

Do you have pains you have not recognized and dealt with? May I invite you to come with me on this radical journey? Let us become accepting individuals. Let us unbind ourselves from the shackles of pain that drain our happiness. Let us empower ourselves. Let us be free to receive the rewards of freedom and happiness from knowing where we have been to knowing on where we want to go. Throughout the journey, be prepared to say: it is liberating!

Sleep tight tonight and reflect on this wonderful line from an Ella Fitzgerald song that goes:

Into each life, some rain must fall…

Remember though that only a rain can create a rainbow.